I am a child of God

Dear Kimball-

It's 5am. Insomnia is super lame. But my mind was racing with how quickly you're changing. How, if I blink, you'll be all grown up, serving a mission or away at college or possibly in love with someone other than me. Gulp. That's a hard one to swallow. You told me the other day that I "looked like a Pincess" (Princess) as I was getting dressed for a party. Cutest thing EVER! I could freeze time and have you stay this little and sweet and happy and funny and adorable forever. Minus the diapers..... just sayin'. While I was beyond devasted that you're a big Sunbeam now at church and not a nursery toddler anymore, it is fun to be in junior Primary and watch you. When the chorister said she wanted to sing "I am a Child of God" you jumped up, raised your hand, (who taught you to do that?) and patted your chest and said over and over "I'm a child of God, I'm a child of God! How'd you know'd I'm a child of God?" I died. So happy. So stinkin' perfect and cute and wanted to stop time forever right then. So can you do me this one small favor? Never ever stop knowing that you're a child of God. And never ever stop being so fun! You are pretty darn fun, in between 3 year old melt downs that is......

xoxo,

mom

New Years Resolutions

I just read on this blog I admire "Stop living a PAUSED life". I have always been guilty of waiting for something. Waiting for a new, improved, better job for my husband. (so grateful that wait is over!) Waiting for "someday" when we have money to buy new furniture or go on a fancy vacation. It was much worse when I was waiting to buy a new house and have babies. I felt like I was waiting to start my life. Now I realize how much time I waste just waiting for the someday that may or may not happen. Choosing to be happy- it truly is a choice. I tell my kids this all the time but really need a reminder myself. I will be happy no matter where I live, how inexpensive or expensive my home is. No matter the cars I drive or purses I carry. I will be happy that my husband has a job instead of upset that he's never home for dinner. (that's the hardest one for me to let go)

So my new years resolution? (I stole this idea from someone as well- but it's very fitting for me) One year from now: I will not regret a single day from 2012

That's it. That sums up what I want my life to be. A life of happiness, not what if's. A life of memorizing the sound of my childrens laughs, my husband's sparkly eyes, the way I feel just after my son tells me he loves me more than icecream. Oh that's good! 2012 is gonna be great, cause that's it's only choice!

I've also thought about the person I want to be and how I want to change. I was preparing my lesson to teach my 4yr old class at church and I ran across this song from David Archuleta. It was exactly what I needed to hear. I've heard this song many times, but for some reason, this time was different. I realized that if I lived this way, my life would truly be better. If everyone lived this way, well lets just say we wouldn't have 90% of our problems.

Happy Birthday Little Man

Dear Kimball, You're 3 now. You survived 3 years of falling down, running into walls, jumping off couches, climbing onto counters, locking me out of the house (multiple times) and escaping from the house. I don't know how you've survived it all, but I'm grateful. You bring our family so much happiness. And it's not just our family, my friends tell me almost daily how much they enjoy you too. Your smile makes all the sleep deprivation worth it! Some milestones this year would be speech. You talk non-stop and say the funniest things, like "mom, what animal you like?" Or "mom, I stink, check it!" (You need to be potty trained but it's alot more complicated than I remember it being with the girls) You love to dance and you turn on Morgan's Barbie CD player with HighSchool Musical and dance to the basketball song all the time. You seem to think your friends would enjoy it too, but they usually just stare at you in amazement. Your dancing skills are quite interesting :) You love to laugh, you love fruit snacks and "motorcycle juice" (that's water with a bit of crystal light sprinkled into it) You love your blue blanket and blue dog. You love, love, love Buzz and Woody from Toy Story and watch it daily. You're obsessed with little figurines- animals or action figues- just as long as they're little! You ask to "snugger me mom?" And I scoop you up and wish you'd never grow up! Please stay this sweet. Please let your life continue to bring others joy. Please continue to be happy and obedient and thoughtful. You are the sweetest boy and I'm so glad you're mine!!! Happy Birthday Kimball!

Back to school photoshoot

Dear chickens- it's just easier if I refer to you that way, since half the time you run around like crazy beheaded chickens. I'm so sad to see you go off to school. I miss you while you're away. Kimball misses you while you're away. But I'm glad for the next two years that you will be at the same school. Taking care of each other.

Because you girls are really good at taking care of each other. This photo is not posed. You did this on your own. Just as you do every night when you insist on sleeping in the same twin size bed together. Even though you have your own rooms and your own beds. It's so sweet how close you are. Please don't stop being best friends. Pretty pretty please with accessories on top?

Taylor- continue to be a friend. You are a really good friend. Especially to this little guy below. You never tire of playing with him and are always willing to grab a diaper or put on his shoes or help him get dressed. You are the sweetest sister and I remember when I just had Kimball, you'd referred to him as "my baby". I believe you really thought that!

Little K- As everyone went off to school and work today you told them all to "come back and play, ok?" Then you told dad to "bring home the hot dogs!" I guess that's your take on daddy bringing home the bacon. You make us laugh.

Dear Morgan, This year will be trickier than all the years before. Filled with homework, friend drama, homework, piano, playdates and homework. Don't give up. You have more talent than anyone I know. And I know talented people! You have so many strengths and are a party planner just like me. I love how BIG your heart is, you are the sweetest thing since candy apples.

Good bye my little chickadees. Go learn and play and tell me all about it!

First Day of School

Dear Kimball- I have a feeling when you learn that the girls left for their first day of school, you won't be smiling any more. It's just you and me kid. It's been a fun summer with sleeping late and swimming, lots of swimming! But now we got to get back into a routine. Naps, snack time, puzzle time, play dates, but most important: NAPS! You wear me out. You are constantly ON! You say the funniest things, like when you lost a piece of the vacuum that dad was fixing. We searched for 20 minutes until I found it on the couch where you'd been playing. You sang "teamwork!" when I told dad I found it. Where you learned that, I still don't know, but it was cute. Not overly cute though, so stop taking things and losing them! I asked you the other day if you wanted to be a big boy like dad and not wear diapers, you told me, "Nah, I'm good..." It made me wonder if you'd ever be potty trained since you sounded like a teenager when you said it! Don't grow up too fast Kimball. I've got 3 more years til I have to send you to school, until then, we've got some serious playing/ breaking things to do! Oh the things you break!

Dear Morgan- My little 4th grader! Will you stop getting so old? Every time I talk to you on the phone I swear I'm talking to an adult. You sound so mature! An old soul. I hope this year you have confidence and know that you're loved. That you can do anything you set your mind to. I hope you realize how much talent that you've been given and don't focus on the things that seem hard. You are creative, kind, thoughtful and a wonderful big sister. You are just the kind of girl I hoped I raise! Stay sweet little M.....

Tater tot- My 2nd grader. You don't walk anywhere you run! You have so much energy and your smile is ear to ear! I love how you play with Kimball. You are such a cute sister. You are also a perfectionist, something you get from your dad. You want to be perfect at everything you do, and you are! You are incredibly smart and talented and a joy to watch. I hope this year you continue to be a wonderful friend to others. I hope that you're a leader and you continue to choose the right. You are so bubbly and fun and I love to see you smile! I'm so lucky to have such a fun daughter!

My little fashionista's headed to their first day of school. Gonna miss you girls like crazy!

Sicky in the house

Dear Riches,
I got sick this weekend. Like really really sick. Puking every hour, all night long sick. But you were sweet. I didn't want you to see me that way, but you were by my side anyway. I didn't want you to get near me because I didn't want you to get sick too, but you held back my hair for me. It wasn't pretty, but you pretended not to notice. I would've gagged had it been you, but you know me...... and you still love me. Why? I wonder. I didn't leave the bed on Saturday and you played with the kids for hours. You made science experiments, put together dinosaurs & took the kids swimming. Sunday was still a bummer day for me, but you restled through church without me. You made dinner, which I finally felt like eating. Yum! You let Morgan make lemon bars (which is so much more work with "help"). You finished my Mom's Mother Day gift and smiled the whole time while doing it. Thank you, by the way. The laundry was out of control, but we folded it together. The dishes were piling up, but you pitched in. The kids were crazy, but you didn't lose your patience. It was a very unproductive weekend. It should've been miserable, since I felt miserable. But it wasn't. I knew it would be ok. I know it will always be ok. You'll still be here, when I'm at my best (which is pretty much ALL the time) or even at my worst. You'll be by my side.

xoxo

single mom-ing it

Dear Riches,

I missed you this weekend while you worked & visited your parents in Arizona. These are some of the things you missed around here: I had to plunge a toilet & you know how I'm ridiculously bad at doing that. I had to vacuum up a fly the size of a BIRD and it was not an easy task since I was gagging the whole time. And just so you know, I am not exaggerating the size of this fly. CREEPY! Kimball helped me though. He kept calling it a bird too, even though fly is almost his favorite word. That should confirm it's size! My friend was sweet enough to drive the kids to school in the morning (just like you usually do for me) and then brought me over a bag of chocolate. She didn't even know that you left me alone with no chocolate for 4 days. You did however leave me with diet coke, so I shouldn't complain. The bag of M&M's slept on your side of the bed, just so I wouldn't feel so alone. Wasn't that nice? We had a crazy windstorm here that blew shingles off the roof and made the fence "wave" according to the kids. I didn't get as scared as I normally do, so I guess I'm growing up while you're away. I dropped the kids off at babysitting group and went to my favorite burrito joint, FreeBirds, and ate all by myself. I normally feel sorry for people who eat at restaurants by themselves but maybe they have been single mom-ing it too and just needed a break. I wished you were with me but didn't feel sorry for myself either. I'm really a big girl now! I went to Ikea and thought of how much you'd hate being there. My shopping course made no sense and I went the wrong direction and had to ditch my cart for awhile to go upstairs and shop some more. You would've shaken your head and swore to never set foot in Ikea again, if you were here. On Saturday I let the girls invite friends over for a Sprinkler Party. I baked pizzas and we froze lemonade to make slushies. They thought I was the coolest mom ever. I am you know. I decided that I can do alot of things without you, I'm not as afraid anymore. But I also decided I don't want to. So please come home already. Taxes are due on Monday and we haven't finished them & the wall paper in the office is a bit overwhelming to take down myself. Life is just nicer with you...... and just so you know, I missed you more than the ipad. And that says alot!